Neologisms IV

I think I’ve hit on my most useful neologism yet, especially for travelers and commuters:

Commodations: (kahm-MOh-day-shuns) (n.) The quality of local bathroom facilities.  (accommodations + commode)  “You spent a month in rural India? wow, how were the commodations?”  “I never eat at McDonald’s but they have OK commodations, better than a gas station.”

Another one just occurred to me one day at work:

Unonymity: (YOU-non-nim-ity) (n.A group decision made with no responsibility assumed by any member of the group.  Unonymous: (You-non-im-ous) (adj.)  (unanimity + anonymity / unanimous + anonymous)  “The committee made some unpopular decisions, but they were unonymous so no-one on the committee would defend the decisions to the rest of us.”

Published in: on May 3, 2013 at 10:44 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Neologisms III

found typos

knowedge (knowledge + edge?) : n. a competitive advantage gained by having special or general knowledge.  “Our firm has the knowedge and contacts to meet or exceed your goals…”

simpify (simplify + simper?) : v. 1. to simplify beyond usefulness 2. to simplify in a coy, ingratiating, or coquettish manner 3. to simplify some concept in a manner that annoys anyone who understood the original idea. “Do these instructions simpify things enough?”

literatire (literature + attire) : n. the uniform or standard attire of literary types or those with literary pretensions. “I don’t go to that cafe any more, I don’t have the right literatire to get served.”


connoisewer (connoisseur + sewer) : n. 1. a self-proclaimed connoisseur whose tastes are not actually all that discriminating or refined “I always thought I had good taste in beer but it turns out I’m a connoisewer; I like Miller High Life as much as Pilsner Urquel.” ; 2. one whose taste extends beyond the conventionally accepted norms to include low, trashy, or vulgar forms.  “He’s a real movie connoisewer; he’s seen all of Arch Hall, Jr.’s films many times.”

Published in: on September 16, 2011 at 2:00 pm  Comments (2)  
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Cracking the code: X52

Page X52 of the Modlvay/Cook/Marsh “Expert” rule book has an illustration by Bill Willingham of part of a castle.  The border “frame” of the picture has some runes written around it, and they are more or less the “Futhark” Viking runes, with a few idiosyncrasies.

As best as I can make out, the runes say (starting at the top left of the frame):

This Is The Z of T The W Pzotektor of D A of War Who R The North I

Probably “pzotektor” should be “protector,” right?  What the Z, T, W, D, and A stand for is anyone’s guess.  I was hoping the inscription would be more coherent but I think it must refer to some game or campaign Willingham was playing.

Update: checked Dragonsfoot, where a poster interprets the inscription as:


I would agree that the rune “T” also stands for Tyr, and I know old inscriptions used a lot of abbreviation, so this looks very probable, although I’d love to know how he got “giant” from “W”.

Published in: on July 3, 2011 at 2:01 pm  Comments (12)  
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Neologisms II

Here’s three more neologism I’ve collected lately.

susject (typo for “suggest” ; suspect + reject) –v.  To form a hunch or suspicion which is then immediately rejected. “When I heard they buried him at sea, I susjected that the story was a hoax.”

deceipt (typo for deceit ; deceit + receipt) n. 1.Written or printed evidence that a lie was told. 2.  The physical evidence of misinformation, lies, or fraud. “Your honor, I hereby submit the following deciepts into evidence…”  “I was amazed to learn that there was a second account book which provided deciepts for years of falsified tax returns.”

hypocracy (typo for hypocrisy ; from the Greek) n. Rule by the subterranean. “Since the Morlock Party got in office, there have been no more elections; it’s a hypocracy.”

Nota bene!  “Hypocracy” has previously been offered as a neologism for lying or hypocritical politicians, but I believe my definition is far more defensible etymologically.  Moreover, there is no need for a term for “lying or hypocritical politicians” when we already have the word “politician” which has exactly the same denotation.

Published in: on June 14, 2011 at 2:10 pm  Comments (2)  
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C&C session report for 9/21/2010

This session saw the return of Crassius, the cleric (who had an apparently mute young girl he dubbed “Silent” in tow), but Trogar the dwarf was nowhere to found. The party fears he stole into Crossroads to rescue Dagodart when the gates closed behind him, but Dagodart escaped on his own and never saw the dwarf.

Suitably resupplied with torches, the party planned to make a mad dash across the plains on Gleep Wurp’s lands to the Pit of Kazum, an old dwarven mining city which has been taken over by the goblin king’s forces and is now a slave pit. At the beginning of the journey the party saw a line of 20 or so gas spores advancing in a line towards Crossroads. The party’s archers dismounted and managed to pick them all off before any got close enough to cause damage, although the long-range shooting depleted a lot of the party’s arrows.

The party now road at a breakneck pace, not even stopping to eat lunch (which almost certainly would not have been an option had the dwarf been present!). Towards the afternoon, a pair of wyverns* were visible overhead, out of range but clearly following the party. They sought a defensive position to stop for the night, and were lucky to find a small stream with a thin line of trees growing on both banks. It was here they camped. On the second watch, fires began to break out among the tree tops and it became clear that the wyverns had riders who were dropping fire pots.

The party moved their encampment and after some confusion as whether they would flee the area or stay in the cover of the woods, they moved to the other side of the stream and set a new campfire as a decoy. The wyvern riders dropped more firepots, and once the tree fires burned out, one landed to investigate. The party seized this opportunity to ambush the wyvern, and slew the rider although the wounded wyvern fled. The other wyvern rider also fled after a light spell was cast upon him, spoiling his night vision.

The party proceeded toward he Pit of Kazum, and met a half-eaten dwarf, who had escaped the “pit of death” with a terrible tale of lizardmen and troglyodytes who now rule the Pit of Kazum and seek human flesh for food. The party healed him as much as possible and he drew detailed maps, and estimated the numbers if inhabitants at 100 lizard men, 30 troglodytes, and 40 dwarf slaves. He also told them that a war party had been dispatched to gather human livestock.  Ominously, he also described a pair of dwarven assassins who had been dispatched from the Pit with orders he did not know. The party considered their options.

  • Seize on the somewhat depleted numbers of lizardfolk while the war party is away and raid the Pit?
  • Pursue and destroy the war parties in detail before assaulting the pit?
  • Play lizardman and goblin against one another?

The only thing they could agree on for the time being was that they should wait to see if Trogar could catch up with them before entering the Pit.

*Do you pronounce “wyvern” as “WHY-VERN” (long i) or “Wi-VERN” (short i)? I always said it with a long i. But I read a lot and end up with all kinds of idiosyncratic pronunciations, especially when it comes to D&D terms since I learned them while very young and among peers with no idea how to pronounce “druid,**” “scythe,***” etc. I ask because our newer player John pronounced it with a short i, and I tried to follow suit, but by the end of the session we were all saying “WHY-VERN” and we never explicitly discussed it. Anyway I am always intrigued by the different pronunciations that grow up in different gaming groups, although that was more a phenomena of younger players, I think.

**My brother always says it “DROOD” no matter how often I say it “DRU-ID.”

***SKYTH, SKiTH, SYTH, SiTH? I hear it all those ways but I think SYTH (long i) is more correct. Even so I pronounce “Scythian” as “Skithian,” but by analogy it should probably be Sithian, right?

Published in: on September 22, 2010 at 3:01 pm  Comments (4)  
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For my (and perhaps your) amusement, a collection of neologisms.

As far as I know I made all of these up, either on purpose of from found typos by myself or others.

surmission (nouning of surmise) (n.)– the product of surmising, i.e. an inference based on scanty evidence or contestable premises. “It is my surmission that since everything is on the internet, we can cancel all our print subscriptions.”

obbreviate (obfuscate + abbreviate) (v.)– to obsfuscate by using an ambiguous, obscure, or misleading abbreviation or acronym. “I just got another memo from HR and they obbreviated so many terms I can’t understand what it is about.” obbreviation (n.): an obfuscatory abbreviation or acronym

disgussion (discussion + disgust) (n.) — to segue a discussion into a venting session about the state of the profession, the workplace, or coworkers. “We were just having a disgussion about the new tardiness policy.” Disguss (v.): to have a disgussion. “Yeah, I read the memo but I don’t have time to disguss it right now.”

suscitation (n.) (resuscitation – re-)– To give support or life to, by extraordinary means. “Our blog is now open for respectful and positive comments on this proposal. Please commence nose-to-anus suscitation.”

anniversity (n.) (anniversary + adversity)– the anniversay of a painful, difficult, or traumatic event. “We’re celebrating our tenth anniversity this week.”

tardine (n.) (sardine + retard; possibly also derived from tardiness)– Idiotic, sheltered, or ineffective office workers, generally used by management to disparage staff. “Send out a tardiness memo to the tardines.”

UPDATE: Apparently surmission has already been coined, almost six years ago according to the Urban dictionary. Shit.

And suscitation is apparently a real word. Double shit. I still really like disgussion though.

Published in: on July 16, 2010 at 10:27 am  Comments (5)  
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Schwerts und Dorkerei: an Oinkendeutschprimer

I’ve recently gotten back in touch with my former college roommate Sean (via email, and eventually we will get a chance to catch up with for real in person some time…). It was Sean who introduced me to the idea of a wonderfully stupid “secret language”/language game similar to Pig Latin, but instead of moving and altering phonemes as you might in Pig Latin, Oinkendeutsch just mixes up bad German and English into a very silly pidgin. I don’t know if Sean or one of his friends invented it, but for reasons I cannot begin to fathom the idea stuck with me for years, and I’d occasionally amuse myself on my long commute by changing the lyrics of songs to Oinkendeutsch.

The main idea is to take German suffixes (such as -in, -en, -ung, etc.) and prefixes (mainly ge-), and some German words that sound like English words and insert them into your speech. You can also use harsh English words to stand in for German words, such as “Oink” for “pig”. In this way yo make up phony German words and use them to pepper your speech, perhaps also using some legitimate German words and even grammar. So you end up with a really stupid sounding pidgin. “Oinkendeutsch” itself uses the phony German word “Oinken” (=pig) and compounds it with the legitimate German word for German (Deutsch) to create Oinkendeutsch. And so on. You might use the German “Viel” (many) for “feel,” just because they sound alike (false friends). You might just make up the German “version” of a word.

Thus, for example, Schwerts und Dorkerei.

Maybe “Klingen” would be a more common German word for “swords.” Maybe “Schwerten” would be the correct plural of “Schwert.” Doesn’t matter. You want homophones, “false friends,” and generally speaking, fake German that someone with a tenuous grasp of the language might partly understand. I’m vaguely convinced “-erei” is a legitimate German noun ending, but even if it isn’t, it sounds right. If you barely remember high school German. Verbs can/should be extended to ridiculous lengths. “Gemakeninung” for “make.” The ge-‘s and -in-en-ung’s will eventually cease to register. Try it.

Anyway Oinkendeutsch would be a great dialect for orcs and other humanoids, I think.

“Halten! Who gost der? Showen mich yourer Paperen!”

(“Halt” is legit German but also recognizable in English. “Halten” is just stupid, because it is unlikely that a goblin guard is going to address intruders formally rather than the familiar “Halt!” from WWII movies. “Gost” = go + -st. “der,” a German article, is pronounced with the same vowel sound as “there” and just sounds like a bad Brooklyn accent for “there”. “Show,” “your,” and “paper” just get “-en” added. “mich” is German for “me” and is pronounced “meesh” so it works. ) Simple, huh? Bonus points for a Col. Klink or Schultzie accent.

I suppose it is vaguely related to GI German. For example, Schweinhund is not really a German word (but it should be).

Yeah, well, it amuses me anyway.

Published in: on June 24, 2010 at 8:29 am  Comments (4)  
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